More Hell, Fewer Dahlias: The Musings of a Radical Feminist.

Posts Tagged ‘crisis

Colorado: give birth to your rapist’s baby, and btw, your hormonal birth control is illegal. Yeah, they’re going there.  A (female!) writer of Amendment 62 states

“Many of the oral contraceptives have an action that makes the womb inhospitable to a developing embryo and, hence, the new living, growing baby is prevented from residing where his or her creator intended until birth.”

Remember, women, you’re just a walking womb!

Go over to Rachel Maddow for more information:


Danny Dyer (British actor) wrote in an advice column in a men’s magazine,

You’ve got nothing to worry about, son. I’d suggest going out on a rampage with the boys, getting on the booze and smashing anything that moves. Then, when some bird falls for you, you can turn the tables and break her heart. Of course, the other option is to cut your ex’s face, and then no one will want her.

An ap0logy has been issued. The apology is half assed.

Due to an extremely regrettable production error, an inappropriate and indefensible response to a letter has appeared in this week’s issue. Zoo editor, Tom Etherington, apologises unreservedly for any offence the response may have caused and has launched an internal enquiry to ensure lessons are learnt.

Let me rewrite that for them.

Due to a culture of mysogyny and lack of understanding of the sexist culture we live in, an inappropriate and indefensible response to a letter has appeared in this week’s issue. Zoo editor, Tom Etherington, apologises unreservedly for blatantly furthering the culture of violence against women and making light of the plight of the millions of women who are physically, emotionally and otherwised abused each day. We have launched an internal enquiry to ensure lessons are learnt.

In honor of February as National Teen Dating Violence Awareness month, here are some links for more information and ways to support teens in making healthy relationships.

Love Is General site with a great toolkit

New Beginnings: New Hampshire based site with good information

USDOJ Office on Violence Against Women: Government site, including information on how the awareness started.

Please remember to teach the teens and young adults in your life about safe, healthy dating and how to get help!

Happy February and Happy Tuesday!

So, we outlined the idea of a rape schedule. Now, what happens when we don’t follow that rape schedule?

Let’s revisit my roommate: “Who gets in the front seat of a cab?”

When we don’t follow the schedule, we get blamed. We get told it is our fault for walking there, for being drunk, for wearing a skirt, for dressing like a slut, for being easy, for not screaming loud enough, for not knowing better, for any possible thing imaginable. It is our fault that we were assaulted.

Now, let’s try to fix our questions, friends.

Who assaults women? Really, who waits in dark alleyways? Who acts like they’re going to walk a woman home and then turns on her? Who is that violent? Who is that much of a pig? Why would someone think they could do that to someone else?

Those are the questions that should be asked.

So next time you get a safety announcement, or are told about  or read about yet another violent act targeting a woman, stop and think about who you’re going to assign the blame to. Because we’re taught to assign the blame to the victim, people. We’re taught not to ask “what kind of man does that?” but “what kind of woman walks home/wears a skirt/is out at night?” And you know what kind of woman does any and all of those things? You. Me. Our friends, sisters, neighbors, girlfriends, mothers.

Do you know what kind of man does that? I hope not. Hopefully it isn’t our brothers, friends, fathers, and boyfriends. But it has to be someone’s brother, friend, father, or boyfriend. Scary thought, isn’t it?  Maybe that’s why we ask victim blaming questions. Oh yeah, we’re taught to by the patriarchy and all that, we’re taught to hate ourselves and to blame ourselves. But maybe, the idea that we’re hanging out with people who respect women so little is a hard thought to deal with.

Start holding attackers and rapists accountable.

Ask, “What sort of man does that?” or “I don’t want to believe he raped her.” instead of “What sort of woman wears that?” and “I don’t believe her.”

Call people out. “She was so drunk man, when we woke up she freaked out but I was just like, what, you were into it last night after those tequila shots!” or  “She said no, but we’d done it earlier, so whatever! She enjoyed it in the end!” That’s rape. And those are conversations I’ve actually heard while on college campuses.  Call those people out. Make sure you’re safe, but raise awareness. Say, “I’d freak out too.” or “I’d file charges as well.” And if nothing is being done, contact the people at your school/office/community. Say, “I heard about a rape, and I’m concerned.”  If you know the victim, be their friend and steer them towards support systems.

Combat sexism before it gets to rape and assault. Jokes with women hating sentiments, movies that glorify rape, a society that teaches that we’re incapable, among so many other things I won’t even start in on, allow a culture of violence.  Start talking, and start education.

Need more info? Want help finding Support Systems?