More Hell, Fewer Dahlias: The Musings of a Radical Feminist.

Archive for the ‘sexist pigs’ Category


Hello! I logged into the email associated with this account to see I’d gotten some pingbacks and that the rape schedule post had garnered a bit of attention. So thanks!

 

No thanks however, to the person commenting on the entry with lots of victim blaming and slut shaming. It was refreshing to post the “not approved” button.

 

In other news, the Republican primary is hilariously awful and my Nana is Catholic and supports Planned Parenthood.  Whoo!

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http://genderbitch.wordpress.com/2010/01/23/intent-its-fucking-magic/

Please, go here and read.

Pear of the awesome linkage linked me to this and it sums up everything i’ve been being upset about for the past, oh week.

My sociology class is hung up on intent. Lots of second wave feminists, including a second wave feminist presenting professor. Addressing those marginalized in comments would be negating the intent of the comments, which was to…uhm.

Well, I’m not really sure what was intended by comments comparing the oppression of lesbians to the “oppression” of brunettes, and I would have loved to find out. But that would have been “villainizing” the girl who made the comments, so instead I should shut the fuck up and “not get angry when people say insensitive things.” because “intent goes a long way in the classroom.”

Yes, intent goes a long way in the classroom. A long way in MARGINALIZING PEOPLE.

Fuck people, srsly.

I’m sure some of my angst over this has to do with actually COMING OUT to my family and claiming the identity of lesbian (I mean I’m telling my GRANDMOTHER, people. I can’t get out of this one) and this is my first actual incident where I’m experiencing marginalization and can talk about it with people in real life.

And talk about it I do. Constantly. Perhaps at the risk of becoming annoying.

But I mean, I just defined kyriarchy for my girlfriend!


FYI: If you google “sex worker photos” or “indian sex worker photo” you can get here. Hm. Also “rape schedule.” I like the third search term the most but oh well, can’t win ’em all. I’m calming myself by thinking that maybe these people were looking for photos of sex workers as they really are: people with families, work, bills to pay, etc and not for any sort of porn purposes. Don’t disabuse me of this notion plz! It is possibly valid.

PSA: So I’ve been fighting the sexist language battle for sometime, with various people and places. Saying “she’s got balls,” “be a man,” and using slang terms for vagina (“cunt” “pussy”) as insults is supporting a sexist culture. Recognizing where these terms come from, why we use them as such, and the systems we are supporting while using them is important.

I’m sure someone much better verses in linguistics and language/culture relation can elaborate/disprove/whatevs this little PSA, but there you have it. It is 2:35 in the morning and I am done with finals, people!


Okay, does everyone know MTV’s television show 16 and Pregnant? I’ve gone back and forth on what aspect of this show to talk about, both positive and negative.  So here’s my handy dandy chart!

Positive

-Sex education ads, encouraging teens to seek information and giving then handy websites

-Fairly realistic portrayals of problems: a child with some sort of heart or lung problem, some difficult labors, and multiple complicated living situations.

Negative

-Exploitive

-Dr. Drew

-Possible glamourizing of situation?

Dr. Drew? He’s a negative? Uhm, yeah. Have you seen the Season wrap up?

Maci and Ryan have had problems all along: Maci is a star mother. She’s in college, she works hard to ensure her son Bentley has food, birthday parties and toys and a stable living situation.

Ryan: can’t hold down a job, shows no interest in his child, doesn’t come home for nights on end, and won’t change his son so Maci can take a shower or study.  He’s called her a bitch, called her lazy, and said they wouldn’t be together if it wasn’t for Bentley, and that he’d never speak to her again if it wasn’t for the baby, that he doesn’t care about Maci.

Well, guess what: you officially suck as a father and a boyfriend.

So there’s Ryan!suck. But where does Drew suck come in?

Right around when, on the season finale, he says that he believes Maci and Ryan can work it out.

Work what out, exactly? Ryan’s immaturity, his lack of care towards his son? Maci doesn’t have shit to work out, she’s got it worked out, except for this deadbeat boy who stays around, calling her a lazy bitch.  But instead of condemning him for his immature, irresponsible behavior, they can “work it out.”

Way to pass the buck, Dr. Drew. This isn’t a relationship problem. It’s a “boy is too fucking immature to be a dad or a husband” problem. It isn’t like they’re not communicating over their budget or how to cook hamburgers, HE’S CALLED HER A BITCH AND STAYED OUT FOR NIGHTS ON END.

If you really supported a strong mother raising a strong child, you’d say “forget him. you can raise your child in a healthy environment where he won’t see his mother mistreated, even if it means no father figure for a while.”

But its so much easier to blame “the couple” (which we all know secretly means the woman) and encourage a heterosexual, nuclear family centered “ideal,” even if it is far from ideal.

So, Dr. Drew, thanks for showing the thousands of young women who watched that it really is their fault. Or at the very least, it isnt HIS fault. Oh god, no. Why won’t that lazy bitch just cooperate?

Over and out,

Radfemles (who is swearing off mainsteam media again.)


As a freshman in college, I took a woman’s studies class. No problems, right? At the time I didn’t consider myself radical, but the seeds were definitely there, and I was definitely a feminist. I’d been calling myself one since I was nine years old, knew everything about Gloria Steinham, and just assumed I’d have no trouble in the class.

I ended up dropping it after seven weeks, switching advisors out of the women’s studies faculty, and never setting foot in another women’s studies class again.  There were some things wrong with the class: it was mostly freshmen, so the level of discourse wasn’t very high and people didn’t know how to respectfully disagree and were still adjusting to a discussion based seminar style class.  But reading my journal from those seven weeks…wow. Some of the things that were said, and how I interpreted them, weren’t conducive at all to fostering a level of respect for all women. Some quotes from my journal:

“Apparently my stay at home mother set back feminism by having a career, getting married, and continuing her career until she had children. I mean, it’s not like her and my da decided, TOGETHER, for mum to stay home because they wanted us to have the attention and support after school that they didn’t always have. Nope! Women shouldn’t make conscious decisions about their life, apparently, especially not with male input. Everyone can afford a nanny or daycare while mom works and have it be a good financial decision.”

“Did you know my Da controls the finances in my house, gives my mum an allowance, and obviously spends the rest drinking and carousing with loose women? That’s what men who have stay at home wives do. All of them. I brought up my parents as an example, and apparently I’m wrong, I didn’t live in my house for sixteen years or anything, watching them pay the bills and make all financial decisions together. I must have missed all the loose women parading through and my mother’s overt oppression. And obviously I’m not at college, because all men with stay at home partners FORCE THEM to stay at home and all female children will be made to do the same! Oh shucks, guess I’ve been brainwashed by the patriarchy into thinking you’re all crazy!”

The amount of hatred for males and women who chose other options than what they had chosen or would choose in the future was scary. At the time, I was particularly interested in what I’ve heard referred to as “Kitchen Feminism.” You know that scene in My Big Fat Greek Wedding, where the women formulate a plan and then coax the males into the plan, giving them all the credit? I was so proud of the women in that scene. They lived in a patriarchal subculture, but managed to do what they wanted anyways, and make decisions for themselves. Do I wish they’d said “Hell no, we aren’t taking this,” walked out, and formed a Greek Women’s Collective complete with lending library? Of course. But that didn’t happen. And instead of being proud of their ability to stretch and challenge their culture while still maintaining a respect for it, my women’s studies class was the environment that faulted them for not starting up the lending library right then and there. The lack of respect for women’s choices (including starting families young, not attending college, having large families/not using birth control, being involved in sex work, just to name a few from those seven weeks) was suffocating. I had to get out, and I did so.

I stopped calling myself a feminist. I wasn’t going to degrade other women and limit their options to fit an upper middle class white worldview. After relating these experiences in a safe space with other feminists, radical and not, I came back to self identifying as a feminist, but the whole experience has made me incredibly wary of academics in feminism.

Except for Mary Daly, who I sort of want to be one day.

Things on my To Blog About Post It: The US Military and Abortion, Alter Boys: Why I’m a Bad Angry Occasional Catholic But Not Really, Tech School Men: Women’s College Doesn’t Equal Lesbian Training Camp, Feminism Reading List, Why Mary Daly Rocks, and Sweetie, You’re a Feminist: A Rant On The New “F-bomb.”

I also have enough Econ HW to kill a cat, so I bid you adieu.


I’m a little late on this, but…

“The number of children who are born subsequent to a first abortion with handicaps has increased dramatically. Why? Because when you abort the first born of any, nature takes its vengeance on the subsequent children,” said Marshall, a Republican.

“In the Old Testament, the first born of every being, animal and man, was dedicated to the Lord. There’s a special punishment Christians would suggest.”

Thanks, Delegate Bob Marshall (R (big surprise?)) of Virginia.

Let’s count what’s wrong in these statements! This is one of my favorite games. I know of people who played drinking games to George W. Bush’s State of the Union Addresses. Okay, let’s begin:

-Medically, there is no link between abortion and disabilities or infertility in the future.

-The ableism in this statement is disgusting. Assuming every child who is born with any sort of disability is a punishment is just plain wrong! I’m surprised he went that route, honestly, I thought that school of thought became less popular in Republican circles after the Sarah Palin Experience, where she lugged her disabled son Trig around everywhere. Is he suggestion that the Republic Pundit Goddess is experiencing a punishment for something? Oh no he didn’ttt.

-Who the hell is he to be referencing the Old Testament in regards to law making?! Why should a book that YOUR version of a higher power gave to YOUR people decide laws for all the people who don’t believe in that book, or don’t have the same beliefs about the same book?!  Just seriously, this bugs me so much.  How dare he? When you’re an elected official, your people are your first priority. NOT your higher power, or your book, or anything. The people you are representing are the opinions you should represent. If every single person, or even the majority that Bob Marshall represents feels that way, then he can use it to inform his law making.

Educate someone about abortion, legality, and the assholes that manage to squirm into our legislature today, people!

(Maybe I should start making a WTF (location) series. It is my theme lately.)


Who the hell are these people and why are they making decisions for us?

Change.org: “Single-Sex Classes on Trial Expect Girls to Sit Down and Shut Up”

As a woman who attended an all female high school and currently a woman’s college, I’m a big fan of  single sex education. Some of the benefits I’ve noticed include a more open environment about issues related to women, especially in regards to sexual violence. Science classes are no longer a battleground between the sexes, and women are encouraged to stand up and talk loudly, among many many other things.

And really, this is sexism that can easily be refuted by some quick googling.  Which leads me to wonder, why in the world are the principals who care more about their own outdated sexist notions than actual studies and information regarding single sex education? Why are we allowing these people to continue to advance in society, and become our educators, politicians and high powered executives?

Let’s stop giving sexism a free pass and start holding sexist jerks accountable.

(check out the link’s website too! really cool people doing really cool things.)